what "delete" actually does

"delete" is one word covering at least four different things. which one you're getting is rarely stated. ask before you upload, not after.

the four meanings

• hidden from you. the post disappears from your view. it is still stored, and people with a direct link may still see it.
• unpublished. gone from feeds and profiles. kept on the server indefinitely -- often on purpose, for moderation or legal reasons.
• soft-deleted. marked deleted, then purged later -- typically after 30 to 90 days. usually the real answer when a privacy policy says "we may retain data for a period after deletion".
• erased. the record and the file behind it are actually removed from storage. rarer than you'd expect. it's more work, and the company sees no benefit.

what to look for

• does the privacy policy give a number of days for deletion, or only say "a reasonable period"? a number means someone implemented it.
• is there a "recently deleted" or "archive" folder? useful -- and it tells you deletion is deferred by default.
• does deleting your account delete your content, or just detach it? these are often different. the second is common.
• can you export your data? a service that can show you everything it holds usually knows what it holds. that is a precondition for being able to delete it.

the part no policy covers

deletion is about the copy on the server. it says nothing about copies other people made while the post was up. if a picture was visible to five thousand people for a week, deleting it removes one copy out of an unknown number. if it was visible to five people for a day, deleting it means considerably more.

that is the real argument for choosing your audience carefully in the first place. deletion is only as strong as the reach you gave the post.

how sissy-haven handles this

deleting a post removes it for everyone immediately. it is not hidden, archived, or held in a bin. the file itself goes on the next cleanup pass (24 hrs).

deleting your account cascades: posts, messages, reactions, and the files behind them all go. you can export everything the app holds about you first from settings. one exception, said out loud: if you reported someone, the report stays for the moderators, with your id removed from it.

posts also stop reaching new people after 30 days on their own, without you doing anything -- unless you extend a post yourself, which starts the 30 days again. and the audience is small by design, which is the part that makes deletion mean something: no app can stop a copy being made, so how many people could have made one is the number that decides what deleting is worth.

if you'd rather post somewhere delete means deleted, you can start here.